‘What’s on your mind?’
‘I’m just really content.’
It’s really daunting starting a new ‘thing’. You want them to like you, find you interesting, attractive, intelligent, funny. Someone who you’d happily spend time silent with but just as easily spend hours talking.
Putting yourself out there, in the wide world, not quite sure who’ll turn up. Bad dates, awkward dates, waiting for that good date. The good date, that leads to another and then another. Then those dates metamorphose into things that don’t feel like ‘dates’ but just spending time together.
Having been floating through all those states recently; it is nerve-wracking, slightly scary, but exciting too. Learning the little quirks, habits and humour of a new person has reminded me of mine. I had become very comfortable in my regular routines; uni, uni reading, work, gym, hang out with the crew, repeat. I wouldn’t say that my routine is drastically different, but ever so shaken up. And, oh how refreshing it is.
I am a big advocate of being single for a significant amount of time in one’s late teens or early 20s. Obviously, everyone has different dating experiences and such, but it’s good and important to be single. I’ve learned a lot about myself and its given me the chance to work some things out and to become stronger in me as Molly. I would argue that you get a chance to connect to yourself in ample ways, gives you an opportunity to focus on certain friendships and to make you comfortable in your skin without needing to seek validation in others.
I’ve had this blog just under a year now. As a space, this has been the written and visual account for a variety of experiences, thoughts, and feelings that I’ve had during 2018 and general singleness. A year in which, as a person, I have changed a lot. I have realised that I like and strive for the happiness of others and that this sometimes comes to my own detriment, that I’m both easy-going and not, and that I like my alone time but also crave to be surrounded by people. I’m in an in-between space of single and not it has made me reflective on this past while. I’m very appreciative of being just me. Had I not had this time I might not be the type of gal that I am or would have come across the person whom I’m seeing now. (how meta)
So, thanks for sticking with me! There is plenty of more mumblings to come, so keep an eye out.
As always, xo.