The taste of a mocha reminds me of mornings walking from my first year student accommodation, it makes me think of brownies shared from the Cotton Rake, of brunches in the Steamie, and last summer. Mochas taste of memories, of gone smiles, kisses that had the hint of sweet coffee. They are nostalgic but pleasantly so.
A teacher once told me that humans tend to remember the negative more strongly than the positive, and to a certain extent I do agree. We are more likely to remember when someone failed to compliment than when they do, that is why it is important to make the effort to remember the positives as well. Different things bring up memories, the smell of make up cleanser always makes me think of one of my sisters, while Lynx will always bring me home to the shared bathroom downstairs.
Digestive biscuits with Nutella make me think of summers spent on windy beaches in Galway while porridge puts me back at the kitchen table in casa al McKeagney.
Cappuccinos will forever place me in Al Castel or Mickey’s in Duino. Even writing this I can picture a bio book on one of those slightly wobbly tables, that coffee smell in the air and Zoe across from me, the revolving conversation of if we will get a biscoff biscuit with our coffee. It brings back 3rd and 4th term, especially 4th, with studying for IB exams. The two of us counting out Euros trying to figure out how many coffee study seshs that we could have that week.
This all ties into the book I’m reading at the moment by Matt Haig, How to Stop Time. Essentially the basic plot is about a man called Tom who ages at a different rate to normal humans. He is the narrative voice of the book. It is set is present day, but since he is over 400 years old the narrative goes between present day and his various memories across time. The language that its written in is quite easy making the reading experience quite relaxing. A welcome break from the dense uni reading. I’m only about half way at the moment but so far I would recommend it. But going back to memories, this Tom character talks about how memories are constantly simmering, waiting to overwhelm him. Although cappuccinoinos and mochas don’t quite have the same impact, I can still understand what Tom means.
I don’t want to get too existential, but just as a little nugget it is funny to think how things change. Change is something that I have always struggled with, even if I know that the change will be a positive thing I still find it hard. Sometimes I do just want time to pause for a moment or two. Memories serve as markers of change, reminders of what was. Not to be too cliche but just like any mocha, memories can be bittersweet. Hindsight trying to change that moment to fit the present.
A mocha will possibly always make me remember what was but thats ok, sometimes it makes me sad but in a nostalgic way, missing what was. Irrational and all that as this may be, though its hard to be rational about memories. At the end of the end of the day I’m only human needing a bit of caffeine.